When Someone Ignores You – What Does That Mean

There are a few sure ways of dealing with people who ignore you. First, understand you don’t have to be everyone’s favorite. Find new friendships with supportive people who share your interests and inspire you. Choose those who inspire you and welcome you, not alienate, and insult you.

When someone refuses to talk to you, it’s hurtful and devastating. Try and catch a breath and avoid jumping into conclusions. If you did something wrong, apologize. If you don’t know the reason, try, and inquire calmly. If the person ignoring you is not willing to have a conversation, let them off the hook and get busy with your life.

Whenever you are dealing directly with such a person, be courteous, and avoid acting in anger. You also need to remain authentic. Don’t pretend to be someone you are not by denying your beliefs and values. You don’t have to fit in. Finally, be approachable and allow room for resolve but don’t hurt yourself in the process.

Reasons Why People Ignore You

Here are 6 top reasons why people ignore you.

1.     You intimidate them.

Believe it or not, people are sometimes intimidated by you.

2.     They feel nervous

Sometimes people feel nervous around you for whatever reason

3.     You upset them

You can upset someone without realizing

4.     They are distracted by a life issue

Something is happening at work or at home.

5.     They are worried

Friends sometimes are worried that you’ll spill off a secret they are keeping.

6.     They are in a bad mood

When some people are in a bad mood they just ignore everyone.

How to Tell If Someone Is Ignoring You

Often, we hurt each other without realizing, you may be commenting on an issue but then the other person interprets it the wrong way. or the person has feelings for you and you don’t seem to realize.

You need to figure out if someone is ignoring you before you become a loner. Sometimes you may not know unless you self-inspect.

Sometimes it’s about them and there are only a few things you can do about that. Most of the time that it’s just in your mind. Luckily, you can find out if and what to do when people ignore you.

There are also chances that you intimidate them. Whatever the reason, you need to be open-minded while handling the issue. Even if the person has hurt you, choose the high road and handle it cautiously.

When Someone Ignores You For No Reason

1.   Avoid jumping to conclusions.

The first assumption when feeling ignored is to assume the worst. You assume that the other person is being malicious or intentionally giving you a cold shoulder. Nurturing those thoughts only makes you more vulnerable. Try and be open-minded. Maybe it has nothing to do with you but has everything to do with the other party. Having that at the back of your mind will help you feel more at ease.

2.     Gather courage, face the person and ask the reason

If you can’t think of a reason why you are getting ignored, just ask. It’s much better to clear the air than to walk around in self-condemnation and doubt. People often don’t want to admit they are indifferent because they did something wrong and they are blaming it on everyone else except themselves. Start by explaining how you feel. Ask questions such as these

  • Are you angry with me? I have noticed that you ignore me, my calls, and texts. What did I do wrong?
  • I’ve noted you avoid my company; you go out with friends after work and come back very late. Is it something that I did?

Ask these questions most sincerely, the person may not be aware they are ignoring you, give them room to explain. Make it more personal by addressing them using their name or a pet name if you are close. 

If there is tension and they can’t talk, postpone the discussion to a future date. Postponing the talk has two advantages. It gives you the time to recover from resentment and also allows the other person to re-evaluate the situation.

3.     Show kindness, apologize, listen, and mend the relationship

Acting rudely towards them will only create a larger gap and will make you feel left out. Emotional intelligence requires you to rise above the resentment and be kind. Forgive the person for making you feel inferior and mend the relationship.

Hear them out. Be willing to collaborate on a long-lasting solution if it’s realistic. Talk about ways to resolve the indifference and adjust the way you treat each other. By openly agreeing, both parties can forge forward.

What To Do When People Ignore You

1.   Give them time

Some people tend to be more needy and clingy. If you find that your friends are ignoring you, instead of giving them more attention, back off and give them some space and time.

2.    Avoid taking it personally

Don’t let their rude nature keep hurting you. It’s common for people to ignore others to feed their egos. It’s their problem, not yours. Even the most popular persons in the world got their list of haters.

3.    Don’t force change

I have learned that I shouldn’t stress over what I can’t change. Sometimes the best option is to let them figure out what they perceive okay with them. It’s not in your place to change someone’s attitude.

4.    Focus on your life, not the issue

If you spend time working on personal goals, other people’s opinions and actions towards you won’t matter much.

5.    Accept disapproval

No matter what you do in life, there will be always people who disapprove of you. When you value the approval of others too highly, you may end up sacrificing your own goals, dreams, and aspirations.

6.     Take time to work through your feelings.

A lot of insecurities about other people arise from our self-esteem. Try to separate your feelings from the reality of the situation.

Final Note

Quiet people are ignored more than people with an outgoing personality. Mostly because they sit back and wait to be noticed while people are busy minding their business. This makes it harder for them to notice you unless you are extraordinary.  

When Someone Falls Out Of Love with You

What To Do When No One Likes You

Check out What To Say and do When Someone Is Being Rude


Am a graduate sociologist and a regular contributor to national publications such as the American Journal of Economics and Sociology, Journal of Applied Social Science and the Annual Review of Sociology.

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